Luna and Hermione Launch George Into Space
by starspangledpumpkin
Summary: All in the name of science.
1. Chapter 1

**Space Address:** 4A Sweet

**Word Count:** 772

**Warnings:** Human endangerment in the name of science.

~o0o

Ever since Hermione realized that Luna and Neville were autistic, she decided to make an effort to become closer to them. She didn't know many people with autism, and it was nice to know someone who just… got it. They usually could find some things to talk about, but while Hermione was driven crazy by how unlimited magic appeared, Luna wanted to push those boundaries. Hermione grew up knowing science and when magic negated that, it set her on edge.

Neville could usually mediate between them, even though he knew he could leave the room with them like this.

And this particular argument started once again over their weekly tea.

"I'm telling you, Luna," said Hermione. "No wizard can fly on a broom and go to the moon. Even with a space suit! Brooms don't have enough thrust to leave the atmosphere and the moon has no life on it."

"How do you know?"

"Because Muggles have been to the moon!" Hermione stressed. "They put plates on the moon where a laser is shot at them and we can measure how far it is."

"But how do you know that a broom can't leave orbit?" Luna asked. "It's lighter weight than a rocket ship so it may not require that necessary thrust."

"Hold on." Hermione took a sip of her tea and spat it out. "Luna! That's the first thing out of your mouth that isn't batshit crazy!"

"Why, thank you."

"We have to test this," said Hermione. "Muggles have a television show called Mythbusters… perhaps it could be… a new segment for _the Quibbler_."

"I know you're suggesting that due to an insatiable desire to be right," said Luna, "but I accept."

They shook hands on it and Neville sighed with relief before helping himself to a cucumber sandwich.

~o0o~

"Right," said George placing the oxygen pack, insulation suit, and other items on the counter in his shop. "I procured the things you asked for, now, who's the poor sap you're going to launch into orbit?"

They both stared at him. George looked over his shoulder to see no one there.

"No," he said and walked into his store room.

_3 hours later_

"It's for a good cause!" Hermione called. "Come on!"

"Please?" Luna begged.

"Why can't you get one of your boyfriends to do it?" he shouted.

"Ron and I are going through a rough patch," said Hermione.

"And no one is as daring as you," said Luna. "Where's that boy who snuck into Umbridge's office and switched her tea out with laxatives?"

"I don't think that's the most daring thing he's done," said Hermione.

"It was a solo mission," she whispered.

"Oh…"

George opened the door, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Alright. Fine."

"Thank you!" The two women hugged him tightly.

"Yeah, yeah, but if something happens to me, you're taking care of Bartholomew, Luna."

"Understood," she said sweetly.

The next day, they had apparated to Ben Nevis and prepared George for his flight. Hermione and Luna spent all night adapting a camera to magic so they could record it and invented a spell for George to cast that would calculate how high he made it. Harry had loaned his firebolt for the task and asked that he not be privy to what they needed it for. Especially, when that reason was science.

George gave them both a thumb's up and took off into the sky while Hermione timed him.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Luna asked.

"Oh, yes, he'll be fine," said Hermione looking through her omnioculars. "… I think. I mean… it's a mile high and he still needs to achieve escape velocity. The firebolt would be plenty faster than that wizard's broom."

"I should think so," said Luna.

Ten minutes later, they saw George hurtling back to earth.

"Oh, dear," said Luna. "He's going too fast."

Hermione drew her wand. _"Arresto Momentum!"_

George and the broom floated safely to the ground. Luna tapped her wand to George's temple.

"_Ennervate."_

His brown eyes fluttered open.

"Did you break orbit?" Hermione asked.

"I'm not sure," he said. "Everything just got really weird and then I passed out."

"Inconclusive," said Hermione with disappointment.

"I think we went about this wrong," said Luna. "George is out of shape. We need someone who's used to flying a broom daily…. Are you still in touch with Viktor?"

"I think I was just insulted," George muttered. "Listen, I'll help you guys get stuff for your experiments, but leave me out of them in the future."

But his words went unheeded as the two women used this experience to remedy their experiment.


	2. Chapter 2

**Space Address:** 5E - Eggs

**Word Count:** 523

**Warning:** Human endangerment in the name of science; vomit; chasing

**This is Part 2 and the end for this fic. I've got too many others I want to flesh out. This is just for funsies.**

The experiments didn't stop with Hermione and Luna. In fact, they grew to the point where the girls developed a way to video tape their experiments in the style of the Muggle show _MythBusters_ and were getting paid by the Department of Mysteries for their data as well as funding for the experiments themselves. Viktor as well as the Holyhead Harpies ended up proving that only the Velozmente (made in the Caribbean) was fast enough for a witch to achieve exit velocity. The witch using a Cleansweep 6 as a control had required rescuing and a new broom.

This led to where the wizard found moon frogs. A witch from the Himalayas, inspired by their discovery and reasons, sent them photographic evidence of moon frogs. They were only visible to the human eye during the full moon which would explain why they were so elusive in the first place.

That myth? Busted, but potentially possible with separate goals. There was no life on the moon, but a determined witch or wizard could make the trip there and back provided they were prepared.

They finally got the funding to go in search of the Crumple-Horned Snorkack. With everything they had discovered, Hermione had become more open-minded and found that she enjoyed things more when she could accept that sometimes… there was no answer. Sometimes the experiments that drew no conclusions were the most fun to do.

"You got the video camera?" Hermione asked Dennis Creevey.

"Rolling," he said, aiming it at them.

"Hello, everyone and welcome to another episode of _MythBusters: Wizard Edition_," said Luna. "Today, we're on the hunt for the Crumple-Horned Snorkack."

"This creature is mostly based on hearsay," said Hermione, "but we'll be the judges of that. Now, the Snorkack is believed to live in Sweden, but after some research we found instances of similar creatures not in Sweden, but in Finland."

"If you look here," said Luna. "You'll see tracks that don't quite resemble those of any creature you know. Let's follow them."

Hermione and Luna followed the tracks until they came to an end right at a nest filled with brightly colored eggs.

"Do Snorkacks lay eggs?" Hermione asked.

"I… I'm not sure," said Luna. "I would have assumed live-births based on the tracks being mammalian, but platypuses lay eggs and they're mammals."

"Very true," Hermione agreed and took a photo of the eggs.

A shadow cast over the three of them, and they turned to see a large purple creature with a curly horn on its nose. It shrieked at them, vomiting a green slime. They took off running, Dennis turning his camera around to film the pursuit. Hermione and Luna fell back slightly to be in frame.

"It's real!" Luna shrieked and laughed maniacally. "I told you my father wasn't crazy! Crumple-Horned Snorkacks are real!"

"And this one is real angry!" said Hermione channeling her inner-Steve Irwin. "We've learned more about these creatures today than any other witch or wizard in the past ten years! How nobody saw this beauty is something we have yet to discover, but we'll soon find out."

The Snorkack roared.

"Film it yourselves!" Dennis screamed. "I quit!"


End file.
